Through the Looking Glass : Getting hitched for all the wrong reasons
By Sarah Delia, staff writer
Posted on April 20, 2006

It’s the charming delusion of the traditional American narrative that the population seems to fall victim to: early engagement. The story contains little complexity to the likes of great plays; although the premature couple’s love is often compared the strength and desire of Romeo and Juliet’s, this is more of a simplistic tale like “When Dick met Jane.” For instance: boy meets girl, girl likes boy, they date, court and     go steady throughout their JMU careers, and when the sound of graduation cheers begins to emerge in early May — that’s when it’s time for the wedding bells to start a-ringin’.

Picture this: I’m at UREC, sweating my butt off on an elliptical I’ve waited over an hour for, when a girl dressed in a white shirt and sweats (all she’s missing is the veil) gracefully pushes the doors to the cardio room open and is glowing with a special secret. Literally, there is a halo around this girl as she smiles at a knowing friend who is on the elliptical next to mine. The friend runs off the calorie-counting machine to look her floating friend in the eyes: “He asked you, didn’t he?” she asked jumping up and down like a monkey. Instead of a verbal response, the angelic girl thrusts her hand forward to reveal a huge chunk of a rock. The two jump up and down ignoring the stares from fellow exercisers such as myself and discuss the details of the wedding. It will be on the beach. All of her family is coming. His family will have to travel from the West Coast, and the flower girl will be her 5-year old niece — the product of her of 25-year-old sister who was also engaged throughout college.

In the bubble society that we live, which praises the usage of plastic forks, disposable razors, throwaway cameras and one-night stands, the last two years of college — at least for the female population of JMU — seems to be dedicated to the complete opposite of that. Finding their other match so they can board Noah’s Ark to engagement after graduation seems to become the priority. Lining up two-by-two to sail the love boat to matrimony, although tempting, is often done for the wrong reasons. Dustin Hoffman, seduced by the infamous Mrs. Robinson in “The Graduate,” explores the ideas of jumping ship from the traditional narrative: yes, he’s supposed to get married, get a job to support the wife and kids, but what happens if there was no pressure to pair off? What if we were all right with being by ourselves and not running to the altar?

Our expectation of what comes out of college: finding the “one,” the person that “lights our fire,” is all in vain. Boys, put down the golden doughnut with the shiny rock attached to it; running down the aisle and pulling a Britney Spears does not show the world that you’re in love. Think of the Kissing Rock and all those couples that dared to test the fate of their love by planting a big one on their partner’s hopeful lips. Just how many of those couples are still together today?

Back to our slightly edited (but still tragically true) tale at UREC, the bride-to-be continued to bounce as her friend insisted that she go with her to pick out the perfect dress. “For sure,” the flaky chick responded before she skipped downstairs to lift weights, no doubt trying to keep toned for the wedding. Her friend climbed back on the elliptical next to mine and smiled “Let’s see if they make it to the dress rehearsal,” she said before returning to the daily sweat. “Well I hope she boards all right,” I responded. Hopefully, her and her mate-to-be will get on the voyage, depart safely and for the right reasons — graduation is only weeks away.

Sarah Delia is a freshman English and art history major who believes that love is a battlefield, not a cruise ship.