Darts & Parts (Submit your own!)
Posted on November 2, 2006

An “it’s-called-Halloween-not-Victoria’s-Secret-Runway-Week” dart to the girls who feel it’s necessary to celebrate the holiday with as much hanging out as possible.
From a senior girl who wouldn’t mind so much if your Wal-Mart lingerie and bunny ears covered all that was meant to be covered.

A “thanks-for-not-stealing-my-identity” pat to the girls who rescued my credit card at McDonald’s and tracked me down to give it back.
From a grateful senior who appreciates good Samaritans like you and now knows Facebook is not only used for bad kinds of stalking.

A “Confucius-say-you-suck” dart to the local Chinese restaurant that wouldn’t deliver to me, but 10 minutes later delivered to my neighbor.
From a hungry senior who doesn’t appreciate your blatant rudeness, and will not be getting Kung Pao chicken from you for a long time.

A “thanks-for-creating-an-English-major’s-worst-nightmare” dart to the person who decided to switch the keyboard keys in the foreign language lab.
From a junior girl who had no other computer to go to at the time, and had to stop make contractions because the apostrophe key was MIA.

An “I-always-love-free-shows” pat to whoever sets off fireworks occasionally in one of the apartment complexes.
From a girl on the third floor of another apartment complex nearby who wishes that you would distract her from work and Facebook a bit more often.

A “what-in-the-world-did-I-do-to-you?” dart to the bird in the tree that apparently felt compelled to poop on my head as I walked to class.
From a girl who was almost late because she was washing her hair in a public bathroom sink.