Darts & Pats (Submit your own!)
Posted on November 9, 2006

A “can-be-used-in-a-variety-of-ways” pat to The Breeze for doubling as an umbrella during a two-mile trek home in the rain.
Form a waterlogged junior who missed the bus home on Tuesday and was grateful for your versatility.

A “way-to-oppress” dart to the commonwealth of Virginia for not allowing me to marry the man of my dreams.
From a junior man who thought that Virginia was for lovers.

A “that-doesn’t-deserve-part-of-the-sidewalk” pat to the biker who deliberately collided with a George Allen lawn sign.
From an Ohio-born JMU senior who is glad he didn’t have to cast his ballot in Virginia.

A “why-do-you-hate-America?” dart to Gail “For Rail” Parker for stealing votes from the mainstream candidates, when everyone knew you would be pwnd like a n00b.
From a senior physics major who, regardless of what the founding fathers intended, believes in the two-party system.

An “up-up-down-down-left-right-left-right-B-A-select-start” pat to the Marching Royal Dukes for playing classic Nintendo songs at the football game.
From an alumnus who caught the game on TV and appreciated the nod to Super Mario Bros., Tetris and more.

A “thanks-for-removing-the-decorations” pat to whoever took down the tampon hanging on a tree in front of Dukes for the last two months.
From a  grateful student who would like to eat his ravioli without having to look at dangling feminine products.