Breeze Perspectives: To wed, or not to wed
The eternal question of when to be betrothed is relative for everyoneAs society has changed, so have the standards for an acceptable age to get married. We don’t live 100 years ago when everyone was expected to get hitched at a very young age, nor should that be the expectation. Now, it has been my experience that the idea of getting married at a young age is frowned upon.
I have never received more opposition over anything than my choice to be engaged during college. It comes from all directions: peers, strangers and just about everyone else.
In today’s world, it seems to be a rule that any lifestyle a woman chooses should be accepted. But it has been my experience that this traditional lifestyle encounters quite a bit of opposition. I am not against the idea of women working by any means—if I was, then I wouldn’t be in college. I think women should have the option of whether to work, stay at home, have a career or get married. We are all adults and should have these options without receiving negative feedback from others.
I have heard the phrase, “But you are just too young.” The question of “what is ‘too young’?” must be raised. I think we each have different dreams and desires, and if it is someone’s desire to be married at a young age, then that shouldn’t be a problem.
Women have a tightrope to walk. If a woman gets married too young, then she is frowned upon; but if she waits too long, people wonder what’s wrong with her. Why do we put so much pressure on each other? Some want to get married young while others want to wait, and both practices should be acceptable. Everyone has a different idea of the right age to get married, but if you try to live by everyone else’s schedule for their own lives, then you will drive yourself crazy, while sacrificing your personal happiness.
When people say that you are “too young,” they are just trying to be “helpful” because they do not want to see you hurt in the long run. I have heard various statistics on the age that is most successful to get married, but no one can determine that for anyone else.
I know people who were married at 18 years old and are still successfully married, while others who got married that young are now divorced. On the other hand, I know people who waited until they were 30 and are successfully married while others are divorced. Some people are ready for marriage at 18, 22, 28, 30, 40 or another age, but there is no age that will guarantee a perfect or successful marriage.
Live your life by your schedule and not just a schedule that appeases others. There is no way to appease everyone, and what matters is your own happiness.
Rachael McDaniel is a senior SMAD major.
