Darts & Pats

Submit Your Own!

Posted on March 20, 2008

A “you-ARE-the-Übermensch” pat to the guy in my philosophy class who donned a speedo and cape during his presentation.
From a fellow classmate who now counts you among Nietzsche, Beethoven and Caesar.

A “get-over-yourself” dart to the seniors complaining about the purple graduation robes.
From a proud senior who thinks if you can’t show your pride on your last day at JMU, you never bled purple to begin with.

A “learn-your-history” dart to The Breeze editors for using the title of a racist film as a front page headline.
From a now-slightly-less-proud graduating senior who’s looking forward to the “Triumph of the Will” headline.

A “fast-food-is-an-understatement” pat to the South Main Wendy’s.
From a group of sophomore guys who had our delicious value menu selections in our hands before we even handed you our cash.

 A “way-to-say-that-you’re-branching-out” dart to JMU for still  inviting mainly business-related companies to the career fair.
From an annoyed psychology major who thought JMU was a liberal arts school.

A “why-didn’t-you-just-take-it-out-of-her-purse?” dart to the girl who picked up money she saw someone else drop and shrugged off returning it.
From God, who wants to remind you to be a good Samaritan or you’ll end up burning for all eternity.

An “I-completely-agree-with-you” pat to the student who darted Parking Services for giving out an excessive number of tickets.
From another student who knows how many parking tickets they’ve given out since August and knows that they are raking in the money.

An “I-don’t-like-to-litter” dart to whoever chooses where to put the cigarette butt containers.
From two smokers who don’t see one anywhere near Miller Hall.