Pat...
A "thanks-for-being-my-Budget-Inn" pat to the random apartment I woke up in on Sunday morning with a rubber chicken in an inappropriate place.

From a junior who now has a hard time looking at himself in the mirror after waking up with a fake bird where the sun don’t shine.

Dart...
A "way-to-howl-at-me-while-I-was-changing" dart to the girl who obviously didn’t expect me to hear her and who ran like the wind after we made eye contact.

From a freshman guy who now knows to shut his blinds while changing.

Dart...
A "way-to-lessen-the-importance" dart to the organization who ripped off the Lance Armstrong slogan just to let everyone know that JMU can "partystrong.".

From a junior who thinks you should be feeling guilty about selling the T-shirts and that you should give all of your profits to the Cancer Foundation.

Dart...
A "why-don’t-you-check-your-information-with-a-doctor-properly" to my "angry fetus" who should ask doctors before complaining about my tattoo.

From an informed sophomore who resents you speaking for her future children and knows that you can still get an epidural with a lower-back tattoo.

Dart...
A "thanks-for-making-me-slip" dart to the person who left her used female condom on the steps of Godwin Hall.

From a disgusted sophomore who had to run home and burn her favorite jeans.

Dart...
A "thanks-for-hitting-me-with-your-Jeep" dart to the person who ran into me while I was crossing the road and threw me 10 ft. and then continuing to drive on your merry way without stopping.

From an angry sophomore who is grateful to have a group of really nice girls help me out after I was hit.