Round two of ‘Ring’ falls short, leaves audiences wanting more

That pesky, homicidal VHS tape is back with a vengeance in "The Ring Two." This time, though, the victims are the audience members, who have the grave misfortune of sitting through nearly two hours of horror clichés, jump scares as planted as corn rows and so much cast-off dialogue that one would believe it was pulled from the depths of a soap opera screenwriter’s wastebasket. "If you ever get scared, just listen to the sound of my voice … follow it," says an almost-convincingly frightened Rachel (Naomi Watts, "21 Grams") to her son, Aidan (David Dorfman, "The Ring"). Heard that before? Thought so. "The Ring Two" has nothing new to offer anyone, especially fans of the horror genre.

Samara (Daveigh Chase, the voice of Lilo in "Lilo and Stitch"), is back from the murky well into which she was cast at the end of "The Ring." This time, she only wants the nurturing affection of a mother figure, which is completely ludicrous in light of the conclusion of the first film. Samara places herself into yet another videotape in order to perpetuate fear, death and plentiful box office receipts.

At the start of the film, Rachel investigates the mysterious death of a 17-year-old boy who died in front of a television set on a soaked living room carpet. She finds and ejects the wicked tape and burns it in a fire barrel beneath the Golden Gate Bridge. The tape squeals in the fire. Yes, it literally shrieks, like a ghost. Samara gets angry and does what any child ghost in her situation would do — she takes over the body of Rachel’s son, Aidan, in an attempt to find motherly support in Rachel.

Gore Verbinski, who directed "The Ring," unfortunately did not return to direct this worn and tattered sequel. Hideo Nakata, who directed "Ringu," the scary Japanese film on which the original was based, has directed "The Ring Two" with a labored lack of confidence. While his shots are well-staged, he has seemingly no control over his cast.

The performances are mostly mediocre at best, which is a shame considering Watts’s already-proven acting talent. The exceptions include Sissy Spacek, who delivers an excellent cameo as Samara’s troubled and mentally ill biological mother. Chase, as Aidan, is convincing in his roll as a frightened little boy with a ghost stuck in his soul.

The film’s score is dreadful. There are moments that are accentuated by "danger music" that just seem ridiculous. One such moment occurs during a scene that involves a visit to Samara’s old house. As Rachel drives down a dirt road, so many high notes are struck that it seems as though the score is trying to remind the audience that "The Ring Two" is, indeed, horrifying. It begs to evoke scares. Apparently driving down a dirt road at 15 mph in the middle of the day is a very frightening ordeal.

"The Ring Two" is a muddled film at best. It has an incoherent plot and no true moments of suspense or fear. The frightening jolts that its trailers promise are lost amidst a poorly written script and a commitment to meet a cliché-per-ten-minutes quota. Save your money. Rent the original film or just watch the trailer and make up a storyline to go along with the images. Anything imagined will likely be better than what this soggy sequel has to offer.

"The Ring Two"
Starring: Naomi Watts and David Dorfman
Run time: 11 mins
Rated: R
2 paws