Brown distracts reader from life with mystery

All Things Literary

It’s going to be a very long semester if I keep reading books like Dan Brown’s "Digital Fortress."
I just finished the book in a span of about 96 hours. I read over 300 pages, chewed my fingernails down to nothing and completely neglected any type of schoolwork or responsibility I had — all so I could read about encryption codes, computer hardware and cyberspace.

Honestly, I feel like I’m reliving the whole Harry Potter phenomena.

Normally, encryption codes and computers and all those sorts of things are about as appealing to me as watching paint dry. Yet somehow, Brown gets to me. For those 96 hours, I desperately cared about the National Security Agency, mathematical algorithms and the study of cryptography. How is it that a girl more concerned with her clothing than her computer becomes so captivated by a book about just that?

Herein lies the genius of Brown’s writing: he tells stories about subjects I know absolutely nothing about, but somehow convinces me I want to know more. His writing style is so hypnotizing it almost infuriates me. He jumps back and forth, through interweaving storylines as often as you turn a page, only giving you enough information to make you crazy for more.

And the suspense he builds — I’m not kidding, it will drive you insane. There’s a reason I was a complete waste of life for four straight days. The book had such a ridiculously strong hold over me that didn’t cease until I read the last page.

But here’s the most irritating part — I knew this would happen. I’ve already read two of Brown’s other books, "The Da Vinci Code" and "Angels and Demons," and the same thing happened. I walked around with a dazed expression on my face, thinking about plots against the Catholic church, antimatter particles, crazed murderers and religious iconology. Quite the bizarre mix, let me assure you.

But reading those books was different. When I read them, I could afford to delve into Brown’s mysterious, surreal worlds and have my life taken over for a few days time — it’s called Christmas and summer vacation.

I, unfortunately, did not have the foresight to realize reading one of his books in the middle of a school week probably would not be the best idea. Needless to say, it was not a productive time. I’ll be paying for this for the next few weeks.

Don’t misunderstand me: Brown is not the most incredible or innovative writer — he is a smart writer. Not to take any credit from him, but it’s more that he has perfected a distinct, formulaic style that just works. So go ahead and read his books — they will suck you in and leave you wanting more, I guarantee it. Just be smart and clear your schedule.

In the meantime, let’s all pray for my psychology grade.